UCSB Parent Handbook

We Wish We Had Known

There are many things we wish our parents had known during those first days, weeks, and months of college. The Summer Orientation Staff would like to share these hints to make your family’s transition to UCSB easier. I wish my parents had known...

...that even though I was striving for independence from my parents, I still wanted to hear their support and encouragement. Just because I’m leaving home doesn’t mean I magically know how to balance a checkbook and do laundry.
...how difficult it was to go home the first few times and how much I didn’t want to go back to school.
...that no matter what classes they tell me to take or what activities to get involved in, I will do what is interesting to me.
...that it’s okay if I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.
...that college-level courses are intense, especially on the fast-paced quarter system.
...that calling me is not bothersome. I actually enjoy hearing their voices.
...not to call me before 10:00 a.m. on Saturday morning!! And just because I wasn’t in my room when they called does not mean I was out “partying.”
...that you really can mail delicious desserts via ground mail!!
...that a C in a university course is not the same as a C in a high school course. You may think I could have done better, but let’s see you try double derivatives at 8am!
...that they instilled good values into me and that I have used them to make the best decisions I can make.
...that moving away from home was not my way of telling them that I don’t love them anymore. If anything, I appreciate how much I love them even more now that I have moved away.
...my views may change and I’m not doing it to be disobedient or disrespectful.

There are also many things that parents wish they had known as their student started college. The parents of the Summer Orientation Staff offer some words of wisdom.
As a parent, I wish I had known...

...that my student thinks of us more than she calls us.
...that my parenting really did prepare my student for an independent college life.
...that sending care packages can really make a difference and brighten my student’s day.
...that the whole campus is very friendly and that there is always someone available to help my daughter in all aspects of her life. The professors are very helpful and CLAS is also a good resource.
...to plan a trip to UCSB about a month before the summer vacation to begin to bring things home—it makes the final move out so much easier.
...that we could put money for textbooks in an ACCESS account.
...that the Faculty Club is a cheap, convenient place to stay if you’re visiting your student. You can call in advance and reserve a room with a credit card (805) 893-3096.
...that my son would succeed in college. Even though I worried so much about him, he did just fine.
...to make hotel reservations well in advance for Parents Weekend and graduation, as local accommodations get booked quickly.
...that CSOs would be available to escort my daughter anywhere she needed to go on campus or in Isla Vista.
...that, for all the advice and experience I can offer, there are some lessons my son will just have to learn on his own.
...that grades aren’t the most important indication of success; what my student actually learns is much more important.
...that being supportive sometimes means keeping your opinion to yourself.
...that my student doesn’t need to enter with a major, it is okay if s/he is undeclared.
...that my student should not visit home within the first couple weeks of moving because it is an important time to start making friends and getting involved, which helps with homesickness.
...how much my student liked it when we visited.

There are many things we wish our parents had known during those first days, weeks, and months of college. The Summer Orientation Staff would like to share these hints to make your family’s transition to UCSB easier. I wish my parents had known...

There are also many things that parents wish they had known as their student started college. The parents of the Summer Orientation Staff offer some words of wisdom. As a parent, I wish I had known...

There are also many things that parents wish they had known as their student started college. The parents of the Summer Orientation Staff offer some words of wisdom.
As a parent, I wish I had known...